Life in NUS is truly hectic, before I know it, 13 weeks have literally “fly” pass me. At the start of this module, I must admit that I hated the notion of blogging. The very mention of the words “blogging” conjured up images of fame hungry attention seekers (an example, Singapore’s very own infamous Steven Lim). In addition, the idea of placing my life – however small an aspect – on public display for all to view was just a little too weird for my liking.

However after 13 weeks and 6 blog entries, blogging actually turned out to be quite enjoyable. I found out that it was indeed pretty exciting to read comments from others (it was nice to know my classmates made the effort to comment on my posts) and likewise pleasant to comment on the views of my classmates. At the very least, blogging is much more FUN then completing “conventional” assignments such as lab reports.

Looking back at my blog entries, I find that this module taught me to be more aware of my non – verbal / verbal (maintain better eye contact!) communication style. It gave us the opportunity to consolidate all the communication skills learnt in our presentation.

The most valuable lesson I learnt through this module is that everybody have their own communication “thumbprint” mould by their cultural / social upbringing. No two people have the exact same style. Hence I must always ensure that my thoughts have been conveyed to them clearly to prevent miscommunication from arising. It is never good to assume the other party knows what I am trying to put across – a habit that I admit I have.

Last, it has really been wonderful getting to know everyone through classroom interactions and blog posts. All the best for the finals and may the exams pass quickly (and painlessly!)

Regards
Valerie

BIODATA

My name is Valerie Wong Hui Ping. I completed my secondary education at Jurongville Secondary (JVSS) and my college education at Jurong Junior College (JJC). I am currently a year 3 undergraduate majoring in Chemistry at National University of Singapore (NUS).

I enjoy learning about chemistry. I feel that science is interesting and relevant to life, particularly chemistry as it is involved in every aspect of our daily life. I find it fascinating to know what the chemicals used in daily life – the ingredients listed behind shampoo bottles no longer need to be a mystery!

In my college days, I was a member in the Track and Field team, competing in long distance. Through my CCA, I learn about endurance, perseverance and self – discipline. I believe that it is important for an individual to have strong self – discipline in order to succeed in any aspect of life. In addition, my CCA gave me the opportunity to learn the importance of team work and how to work harmoniously with my team members.

I enjoy traveling and learning about the culture of other's. As different cultures live, work and play differently; I find it interesting to view life from the lenses of another culture’s perspective. I believe that much can be learnt from the people of different cultures; and traveling helps us to acquire a global outlook on life.

Is it time for some “Netiquette?”

Recently I was listening to the radio and one of the radio programs was on the difficulties of online communication. The radio deejay felt that negotiating real world communication is tricky enough let alone having to handle virtual communication such as online chatting and social websites, for example, Facebook.

This led me to ponder about online communication and the problems that arise from it. In this day and age, it is almost quite impossible to avoid online communication. Online communication is becoming more prevalent – emails, online forums, blogs, Facebook, YouTube, MSN, SecondLife are just but a few modes of online communication that youths today engage in.

I feel that the online world is impersonal – we are unable to see the other party’s facial expression, body language or hear their tone of voice. Words and a few emo – icons are all we have to rely on in the sphere of online communication. As it is impersonal or as some would put it “faceless”, it becomes all too easy for people interacting online to forget that they are communicating with a real human who has feelings and not just to a computer screen. Hence most people tend to behave in a way that they would never act in real life. This is akin to some people behind the wheel of a car do: They speed and cut dangerously into the paths of others, swear and make obscene gestures and generally behave like a menace.

On the Internet, people tend to get more irrational easily and fail to practice self – regulation. Some behave horribly rude and offensive. This is often seen in harsh and unbelievably rude comments posted in net forums, for example, STOMP. In addition, some do not think twice in engaging in flame wars against those that they dislike or sending a. They think that a lower standard of morals or personal behavior is acceptable in cyberspace; nobody knows who you are anyway.

In addition as online communication lacks visual cues; it is easy to misinterpret the meaning of messages that are written. Many a times innocent comments posted online are mistaken for sarcasm / criticism when the writer’s real intention might be far from that. He / She might be joking or having difficulties conveying his / her opinions across. This often leads to misunderstandings and may actually affect real world relationship, for example, falling out with a colleague over email exchanges.

What do you guys think, is online communication trickier then real world? Are the standards of behavior online different from that in real life?

The Land of a Million Smiles

The Land of a Million Smiles

While visiting my father in Bangkok, we went to a traditional Thai restaurant to dine. The restaurant was fairly crowded and at the table next to ours was a Caucasian couple.

Halfway through our meal, we witness a commotion brewing between both couple and restaurant’s manager. There was a disagreement over the cost of the bill. The couple insisted that they were unfairly over charged. They pointed out to the manager that they did not place orders on three of the dishes and could not understand why they were still being billed for it.

However the manager, being inept at English, could not comprehend the couple. As the disagreement dragged on, the couple got increasingly frustrated. Their voices started to grow louder and the Caucasian guy began jabbing his fingers on the table agitatedly; drawing the attention of other diners present.

To my utmost surprise, the restaurant manager started smiling and laughing politely to the couple. There could not be a less appropriate reaction from the manager; and this served to further exasperate the couple. It was clear that the couple felt belittled that they were not taken seriously. Feeling insulted, they paid the bill and stormed out of the restaurant in a huff.

It was only when my father explained why that I realized the good intentions of the restaurant manager.

In Thailand, shouting and shows of annoyance are cultural taboos. Most Thaïs live by the principle “Jai Yen Yen” – meaning a cool heart and anger is considered an anathema to most, if not all situations. The Thais believe that shouting and displays of annoyances are signs of a lack of self – discipline and good moral upbringing. Hence it is a norm for a Thai caught in such a situation to help “save face” by smiling. Therefore the manager in an attempt to help the couple “save face” in the crowded restaurant naturally started smiling and laughing politely to defuse the situation.

This aspect of Thai’s culture is certainly unique and different from Singapore – you would never find a right – minded restaurant manager reacting in such a manner to a complaint would you?

Business Correspondence Critique

Original Business Letter

MSIG Insurance (Singapore) Pte Ltd
4, Shenton Way, #21-01, SGX Centre 2, Singapore 068807 Telephone: (65) 6827 7888
blanca_d@sg.msig-asia.com

17 November 2008
Tan Liang How
142
Pandan Gardens Street 26
#08-132
Pandan Heights
Singapore 600132

Dear Valued Customer

Renewal of Mortgagee Interest Policy (MCST Property)

We are please to renew your Mortgagee Interest Policy (MCST Property) in relation to you mortgage loan from DBS Bank Ltd (“DBS”). The annual premium will be deducted from your designated bank account on the 15th of the following month. If the premium deduction is not successful on the deduction date, DBS will deduct the premium from your designated bank account or any account you maintain with DBS, between 26th and 28th (or the next working day) of the same month.

Please insure separately your home contents and renovations, as they are not covered by this insurance. We will be happy to help you with the insurance at special rates for DBS customers. Should you have any enquiry, please feel free to call or email us for details.

Thank you for insuring with us.

Yours Sincerely
Alice Rodricks
Manager, Bancassurance

Edited version of the business letter

MSIG Insurance (Singapore) Pte Ltd
4, Shenton Way, #21-01, SGX Centre 2, Singapore 068807
(65) 6827 7888
blanca_d@sg.msig-asia.com

17 November 2008

Mr Tan Liang How
Block 142 PandanHeights
#08-132 Pandan Gardens Street 26
Singapore 600132

Dear Mr Tan Liang How

Renewal of Mortgagee Interest Policy (MCST Property)

We are please to renew your Mortgagee Interest Policy (MCST Property) in relation to you mortgage loan from DBS Bank Ltd (“DBS”).

The annual premium will be deducted from your designated bank account on the 15th of the following month.

If the premium deduction is not successful on the deduction date, DBS will deduct the premium from your designated bank account or any account you maintain with DBS, between 26th and 28th (or the next working day) of the same month.

Please insure separately your home contents and renovations, as they are not covered by this insurance. We will be happy to help you with the insurance at special rates for DBS customers. Just call or email us for details.

Thank you for insuring with us.

Yours Sincerely

Alice Rodricks

Alice Rodricks
Manager, Bancassurance

Letterhead
The letter head should be aligned in the middle of the page and not aligned to the left of page. The telephone number should be placed beneath the company’s address rather then aligned to the right of page.

Date
The date is correctly aligned to the left of page. However there should be line spacing between the date and the recipient’s name and address.

Recipient’s Name & Address
As the company knows the name of the recipient, the company should use “Dear Mr Tan” rather then merely “Dear Valued Customer”. The recipient’s name and address is correctly aligned. However rather then just writing the recipient’s name, a courtesy title such as Mr, Dr or Prof should be given. In addition, the recipient’s address can be written as “Block 142” rather then just writing “142”.

Salutation
As the company knows the name of the recipient, the company should use “Dear Mr Tan” rather then merely “Dear Valued Customer”.

Subject Line
The subject line should be aligned to the left of page.

Paragraph Indentation
The paragraphs are correctly aligned to the left of the page.

Signature & Sender’s Name
The signature and sender’s name should be aligned to the left of page. The sender’s signature is absent. I feel that it is important to sign off as it gives a personal touch to the letter and makes the recipient feel worthy.

Complimentary Close
As the company did not greet the recipient by his name in the salutation, the letter should close with “Yours faithfully” rather then “Yours Sincerely”.

7Cs in Writing
The letter uses positive wording and is of appropriate tone. The language is formal and there are no errors in punctuation, word usage, spelling, grammar and information. The vocabulary is simple. There are no wordy expressions and the sentences are kept short.

The contents are linked in an orderly and logical manner making the letter easy to read. The letter is made even clearer by the emphasis of important deadlines in bold letters.

The letter gives adequate information as to when the deduction will be made and what will happen of the deduction is unsuccessful. It also informs the recipient that his policy does not cover certain aspects and who he can approach for further assistance.

However the first paragraph is quite lengthy and can be further broken down to enable an even clearer presentation of the contents.

"You will lose your surname"

My friend Kate has an elder brother, Tom. As Tom is the only son in the family, his parents especially dote on him and he is the apple of their eye. They provide him with the best that they can afford and Tom did not disappoint his parents. He excelled in his studies and currently holds a cushy job as a risk analyst; doing them proud.

Tom has a girl friend called Nurul. She is a nice girl with a great personality. They have a serious relationship with marriage on the cards; having dated for two years. The problem is that she is a Muslim and has Islam as her religion. Under the Islam law, in order for them to wed, Tom will have to convert to Islam and adopt a Muslim name; renouncing his family surname. While Tom has no problems embracing the Muslim culture, and has begin to learn all he can about Islam – the meaning of the Quran (their holy book) and even fasting with his girl friend’s family during Ramadan.

The same cannot be said about his parents. They are traditional Chinese parents and hold conservative views on religion and interracial marriages. They expect Tom – their only son – to fulfill his traditional duties as a male such as carrying on the family surname, ensuring the continuation of this lineage and taking care of their last rites when the time comes. Over the course of two years, they took for granted that it was not a serious relationship and the prospect of their son marrying Nurul never crossed their mind. It came as a complete bombshell when Tom proposed to Nurul. The very idea that Tom is planning to marry – against their wishes – a Muslim girl and abdicate the family tradition is like a tight slap across their faces. They view Tom’s actions as the ultimate act of betrayal and unfilial piety.

Tom’s father feels that he will not be able to face their relatives and will lose their “reputation” if Tom converts. Tom’s mother is extremely hurt that Tom seems to care more about Nurul. She felt that after all she had done for her only son; Tom refuses to reciprocate and sacrifice his relationship with Nurul for the happiness of his mother.

They refuse to acknowledge Nurul and treat her with hostility when she visits; viewing her as “competitor” for their son’s affection. Their hostility affects Nurul and places a considerable amount of strain on Tom’s relationship with her.

Tom is acutely frustrated at the failure of his parents to accept Nurul. He has tried his utmost to talk his parents around. He continually assures them that he still loves them and that their acceptance of Nurul means a great deal to the both of them. He feels that it is unfair that, despite his successful career, his father views him as an embarrassment just because he is marrying a Muslim. He is insulted that his parents do not take him seriously despite him being 28 and think that he is just a young fooling boy blinded by love. Tom is convinced that if his parents truly love him, they would never try to interfere with his relationship and would have respected his decision to wed Nurul.

The relationship between Tom and his parents have turned ugly. Arguments on both sides have escalated to the extent that Tom’s father threatens to disown Tom.

If you were Nurul, how would you help Tom resolve this interpersonal conflict? If you were Tom how can you make your parents see that your conversion to Islam does not equate to you turning your back against them? Would you sacrifice your family and continue with marriage in the event that you failed to convince your parents?

Effective Communication Skills

So, what precisely is the usefulness of effective communication? Why the big hoopla over it? What is so difficult about talking to another person? Isn’t it natural? What’s there to be learnt about?

Effective communication skills do not only merely involve speaking etc. It is all inclusive – interpersonal, intergroup, intragroup, intercultural, non verbal, keen listening are some of the main skills. It can be easily seen that effective communication are essential in each and every domain of our life, be it individual or professional.

Very soon I will find myself exiting the academic sphere and stepping into the whirlwind of working society. Having mastery in skills such as interpersonal and intercultural communication will be indispensable to me from the very first moment – landing THE job. In this knowledge based economy where fresh graduates are a dime a dozen, technical or academic qualifications are most likely to be quite similar for all candidates vying for the plum job. Communication skills have henceforth become the determining element in helping fresh graduates gain employment. (Winsor, Curtis and Stephens, 1997) More and more emphasis is placed on speaking skills rather then a graduate’s CAP. Companies are apt to hire candidates who can communicate competently during interviews. This is simple logic. Employees who are good communicators present a healthy image of a company. Who would want a person mediocre at communication to be the face of their company?? It is crucial to be well versed in communication skills as it would give me a slight edge over others and that would be a boost to my future job search.

In addition, I personally feel that these abilities such as being able to relate to co – workers or clients (interpersonal communication), listening critically, designating control, group problem solving (intragroup communication), asking questions appropriately to acquire understanding, to work in teams and with people from diverse cultures (intercultural communication) is a must for myself if I desire a successful and fulfilling corporate career in time to come. Proficiency in communication can also help me to form positive networks for future collaborations and prevent misunderstandings among my work mates.

Hence I hope to be able to grasp at least the basics of these skills before I leap head – on and face the real world.